| a text to tell..

during one of my sleepless nights, i texted my beloved telling him this..

"I remember the day that we met.. It was at dawn back then.. i was just wearing fliflops on my feet and you approached me and welcomed me with the greatest smile i have ever seen.. Then you took me home.. a home to your heart.. Then, when im about to leave, i knew that i'll not be taking my heart with me anymore.. I was touched when you told me that, "itong mukhang ito, hindi ka pababayaan nito.." from that point, i knew that i was being taken care of.. I knew that i was in good hands.. And you proved me right.. You showed sincerity to your actions and i was happy with that.. More than happy to be exact.. You were actually the only person who did things like that for me.. I was thankful.. But when you flew for Palawan, it seemed that you dont wanna come back anymore.. Much more when you left for the States.. I cant blame you for that.. People change as well as their feelings and thoughts.. But guess what, my love has always been there for you.. It never changed.. Still trying to check on you through your blogs - well, that's the most i can do at that time.. And now you're back, and obviously trying to get rid of me.. MASAKIT!! guess i have to forget you again for another attempt.. Hope this will be the last cause people do get tired.. Not because there's no love anymore, but because of a realization that what i have for you - no matter how try to offer it to you, you will never accept it cause you were too afraid to give it a try.. Goodbye ***! Best of luck.. My heart will always remember a person like you.."

And then he replied,

"Ey, im not trying to get rid of you.. I've been honest with you.. i cant give something i dont have.. i dont wanna be unfair to you.. I still love my ex.. Ayokong in the end you'd feel like i cheated you.. I do like you, you know that.. But i cant give you what you need.. Besides, i wont be staying in Manila always.. We can be friends though.. Im sorry mah beh, but i dont wanna lie to you or cheat you of something that you deserve.. You deserve someone who would love you as much as you love 'em.."

Im hurting.. i am because im desperately in love with the person.. fate must've gotten her hands on me again.. maybe i dont deserve to have him or the other way around.. but either way - the hell i care.. even if we dont deserve each other, what matters most is that i love the person.. nothing can change that.. even fate can not..