| new start..

please do check out my new home..

| our new baby - cross-breed of pomeranian and chihuahua

| someday..

Someday, you'll gonna realize One day, you'll see this through my eyes But then I won't even be thereI'll be happy somewhere Even if I can't I know you don't really see my worth You think you're the last guy on earth Well, I've got news for you I know I'm not that strong But it won't take long, won't take long Cause someday, someone's gonna love me The way I wanted you to need meSomeday, someone's gonna take your place One day, I'll forget about you You'll see, I won't even miss you Someday, someday But now, I know you can tell I'm down and I'm not doin' well But one day, these tears They will all run dryI won't have to cry sweet goodbye Cause someday, someone's gonna love me The way I wanted you to need me Someday, someone's gonna take your place, woh One day, I'll forget about you You'll see, I won't even miss you Someday, I know someone's gonna be there Someday, someone's gonna love me The way I wanted you to need me Someday, someone's gonna take your place One day, I'll forget about you You'll see, I won't even miss you Someday, someday...

| chill out..

smoke.. drink.. watch some dvds.. sit back and relax.. hay!!! miss my smoking buddies and homies from college.. miss my bestfriend jay..

just wanna share something.. im watching jolina and marvin's film right now on Cinema1..

Bujoy: Hindi mo naman ako maiintindihan eh dahil kahet kelan hindi moko inintindi.. Dahil kaibigan mo lang ako.. And that's all i was to you, Ned.. Your bestfriend.. Taga-gawa ng assignments mo, taga-enrol, takbuhan kapag may problema.. And i am so stupid to make the biggest mistake of falling in love with my bestfriend.. Dahil kahet kelan di mo naman ako kayang mahalin - ng higit pa sa isang kaibigan..

Ned: Bujoy (apologetic tone)

Bujoy: So ngayong alam mo na, i think you can get out of my life..

(music scoring - Nanghihinayang by Jeremiah)

peace!

| help me choose between SE Z610 or K800i..

pictures from gsmarena

| the nature of my work..

• have to generate audits/evaluations for each CSP on a weekly basis..
• have to give immediate feedback regarding an audited call for each coaching session and monitor progress in agent performance over a period of time..
• have to maintain related logs, reports, & documents – making sure that these are consistently accurate and readily available for reference at any given time..
• have to oversee the auditing & coaching procedures become standard and update these whenever applicable..
• have to update the Quality Board everyday!
• have to do the Minutes of the Calibration and QA Meetings sometimes..
• have to send every team managers the assessment and action plans of each CSPs..
• the only good thing about this job - unlimited breaks!!! wooohooo!!!

- but now i'm getting tired :-(

| happy thoughts..

just finished watchin Queer As Folk Season 5... i know, im a bit too late but just purchased the last season couple of weeks of ago.. i must say im not happy with how it ended.. brian and justin never got married.. as they say, good things never last.. i looove the soundtrack and im dying to have em... planning to hit the stores and check if they have it on their list..

last saturday was our christmas party.. it started boring and then it became more boring and before it ended, i was bored to death.. being a part of the registration team does not mean i cant have fun.. i nearly seated for only an hour and started to mingle with my peeps.. i was wearin a low-profile-plain-collar-shirt-with-matching-cowboy-pants because my sister told me not to show off.. have i known that everybody will wear their best attire ever (as far as i know), i probably pick a more suitable outfit that night.. but that's me, whatever my sister wears, i would complement it.. as what others say, everytime they see us - it's like a walkin manequins.. a pair of manequins.. we left cause we needed to because the temperature's rising - as well as the boredom level.. we decided to check out some clubs in timog and we ended up dancing our hearts out in club industry.. kamusta naman ang techno and trance dance steps kow?? - pero keri lang!!! uber sa saya!!

monday was an okay day.. food day for our account..

tuesday was slumber party (in my bedroom)

wednesday was another slumber party..

thursday - went back on track.. work! work! and more work! geeezz, i have grown to be a company slave.. darn!

happiest thoughts - finally had the chance to meet the person i've been stalkin' (kind of!).. *cheers* he was so nice and kind and generous and sweet? - that i have to discover but i do think he is.. he danced with me.. he called me last night *blushes*.. we talked.. and kissed me goodnight.. i woke him up and now he's off to meet his dad... cool, isn't it?? try this, he'll be out of the country soon.. so much for the happy thoughts..

not quite yet, today is what we have... seize the moment..

for now, i'll take the chance and never have regrets, cause for once, it was what i wanted..

| more than cups of coffee..

claimed my starbucks planner last night at shangri-la.. me and my sis went out of work just to claim the much-so awaited planner that i have been dying to have.. spent 13 moccha frappucinos and 11 toffee nut frappes as well just to have it.. and it's worth the wait and the price!! but it's not the number of cups i have spent that makes it more meaningful rather, it's the number of times me and my sister spent to bond, relax and have fun.. more than anything else, i'd like to thank my sister for sitting with me, sharing stories with me, hearing my grudges and pain and all the miseries i have, laughing with the silliest jokes i crank, making me believe that there will always be someone ready to take the love that i have and that i am her CUTEST brother, bestfriend, soulmate, officemate, partner.. well, my sister is the hottest though.. what a year to end!

fyi, i lost my ID on my way to shang.. fuck!

| one of my fave college pics :-)

| im bringin sexy back :-)

went to Panay Kalipay last Tuesday and then to Giligan's Island and then to Clubbers where we parteeed till we dropped.. i had such a great night with my bestfriend - our first dance together, our first night out and our first hehe.. no eavesdroppin'.. then last Thursday, we painted the town red cause it's ann's 22nd birthday.. we ate at Dencio's and then kicked our asses in MUGEN where this URBAN NATION thingy was so damn fucking hot!!! loved the songs they played, most of them were mine.. i looooveee my friends so much!!!

i am back and here i am playin and flirtin and playin and flirtin, oh did i say playin and flirtin??? maybe im not for the serious relationship at all.. maybe i am here just to fuck up.. and maybe i am better off this way..

one thing is certain though, i am having the greatest time of my life :-)

| and so it ended..

stupid me :-(

| my new hair..

| my baby's blog.. so sweet.. :-)

NOTE: What you’re gonna read might shock or offend you…It will reveal things that only a select few know. But im so tired of pretending. This is me, the real me. I only ask that you understand. That you try to see that what lies beyond all of this… is nothing short of beautiful…. - marco

I was a dreamer once. I dreamt of things far away, of things reachable only by pure emotion… of things symbolic. Of things special. Once, I dreamt of love. And those dreams betrayed me… and betray me hard they did.

They came, you know, like Venus Flytraps, spellbinding, falsely supporting me with Herculean strength, blinding my eyes with promises of forever, whispered kisses that struck my heart like golden arrows… then left me with scars I barely noticed… only evident when it was already too late… like a disease, it had already eaten me up.

They spared me no pity… the horsemen... Save for a select few, they didn’t give a damn about how I felt. They only cared about whether I gave them what they wanted… too late did their motives become clear… it was when my body was badly bruised from unemotional sex, my lips chapped from kisses of lust, evocative of icy chill, and my eyes, dripping with the tears of broken vows…

I could only cry. It was the only thing I could do. And while I was weeping, the whole world went on, that subway of adulterated creation. It was medieval, surreal. I felt as if I was swimming in a pool filled with nothing but confusion, with ripples rivaling that of the ocean… and the worst thing was… I was alone. 3 years. 3 years of flings, dates – guys pretending to be something they’re not… 3 years of playing. 3 years of lies.

Then on, I became a skeptic. I was sure that it was karma – payback for all the hurt I gave to the guys who didn’t meet my standards - the price of playing with emotions. The exchange that fate deemed necessary to make me feel what I made those guys feel when I broke up with them…. And then I realized that I was so unfair…. That I was an ass. And that closed me up… almost entirely.
And although there were still some guys wanting to get together with me, somehow, it didn’t make any sense… my heart had become cold, and it couldn’t let anyone in. Not even for a second of honest flirting…I just went out for fun, moreso, bad fun…all I knew was I can’t get hurt again…

Sigh...it was soooo dark.

THEN you came, Julius. My Julius. And I cried again… but this time, it was tears of joy.
You shone like the sun, and all I felt was warmth. Like that fuzzy feeling you get that everything’s gonna be ok. You melted me. I felt emotions running through me again like a sudden rush of rose petals, floating gracefully in the autumn sun... And in that special place where there’s just you and me, that place where I can hold you in my arms, and whisper sweet nothings, that place where you allowed me to see your heart …then I realized…. You’re the one.

… God’s angel, sent from up above. With wings of silk and lace….enabling me to sleep in your warm embrace… baby, it was all I could have ever wanted. All that I ever needed.

… The dreams started coming again, only this time, it felt real, genuine, like as if all the hurting in the past was worth it…. And for the first time in a long time, I felt like the happiest guy in the whole world.

My heart, my whole heart…I gave to you. It’s yours now. With you, I see a silver streak – a lining of hope, that gives me life… a promise that the other lost parts would grow back. All of it – with your name etched on its surface, lovingly.

You saved my heart… from being broken apart completely.

You told me that you find me perfect… Baby, im not. Im not… But despite my imperfections, I promise to be here for you always…. Always.

And just as the song goes… “I will honor every word that I say… on this day.”

Julius… I love you. I know I’ve said this a lot of times. And I will say it over and over again, without hesitation. You get me like no one ever did. You see into my soul.. You are my angel, the one I’ve been waiting for. The love of my life.

I will love you forever, and with you by my side, I know I can face the world again.

I will proudly walk with you while holding your hand, and kiss you wherever the place will be. Di ako mahihiya.

Light is in your eyes. Love is in your heart. And I can’t believe you’re mine.
AND NOW THE STORY OF MY LIFE IS ALL ABOUT YOU.
“My angel in the night, you are the love, the love of my life…”
“You gave me everything when you gave your heart to me…”
Like what you said…”our journey has started and im looking forward to years of unity, respect and a lot of love.” Julius my baby, I will uphold our promises sealed with kisses and a pinky swear.
… Walang iwanan to’

Again, I love you. Take care always…. I will be your prince forever, as you will be mine.

| marco - my sweetie..

It has been 11 long yearning months since the last time I committed myself into a relationship, and here I am again, submitting myself to someone I think deserving of my love and time, someone who’s worth the wait and someone who I must say (cliché) completes me..

It started last week in downe... I received an invitation from him and I immediately replied cause I do like the fact that we had the same hair color – blonde! Come Sunday morning, I received another message from him telling me his digits.. I saved it to my fone and went off to the christening of my goddaughter in Makati.. during the christening till the end, I was rigorously texting him, telling him that I was the guy he added in downe, but I received no reply from him.. having second thoughts of the number I saved to my fone, I checked his message again as I arrived to the office.. and my instincts were right – because I was such in a hurry that morning, I put a wrong fone number in my fone :-) my bad!! But that was okay, I texted him to the right number and then he replied.. and the rest is history!!

But just to give you the highlights of our escapades so far, I had great time talking to him.. I shared everything there is to share to him and answered all his questions without even thinking twice.. and so I decided to meet him up last Friday.. it was my rest day so I have the whole day to spend with him.. we met at Shangri-la around 3pm (and as expected, I was late because of traffic).. he was wearing pink top then, and boy, he was so gorgeous with his shades on.. he was so white and he had this kinky huge eyes.. I could not deny the fact that I got intimidated by his looks but he reassured me that everything’s just fine.. he even kissed me in public.. that was so sweet of him..

We went to a private place here in pasig where he and I can intimately know each other.. that was indeed one of the best days of my life.. nothing but kissin and huggin.. and im so okay with that.. I could not ask for more.. he’s everything I ever wanted.. and the best part of it, I never planned it nor I even asked for him, I mean I haven’t wished for a long time because I know that wishes do not come true… and GOD is so good to me.. he gave me the perfect man I could ever ask for even without asking for him..

And then we had our dinner in Shangri-la, I believe Cravings was the name of the restaurant.. and then we had coffee.. if it weren’t because of safety issues, I would not let him leave me that early.. but my boy lives in Paranaque, and that’s the reason why we had to part ways that early (as for me!) but that was alright.. spending time with him would never be enough.. he captured my heart.. and im so grateful I willingly surrender..

Our journey has started and im looking forward to years of unity, respect and a lot of love..
Let’s hear it for the boy!!

I love you MARCO AJERICO SINDIONG.. my heart, my body and my soul will forever be yours..

| intoxicated, exhausted and sluggish

| surprise..

somebody got promoted...

and that was me..

i was hired as a new Quality Assurance Professional for Capital One :-)

| ginger snaps..

*** taken from the 1st birthday of my goddaughter at the far right - keisha ***

| my 22nd....

Happy Birthday

JAY!!

A lot of thanks to those who greeted me..

Mommy and relatives

Malu from sitel

Ninay from feu

Marlene from feu

Ann from filinvest

Cris from sitel

Missy from feu

Jessie from convergys

Chlaire from feu

Narth from lung center

Ate alpi from sitel

Mommy Joanne from sitel

Xhandz from sitel

Judi from sitel

Patrick from sitel

Cris from feu

Nicole from feu

Kuya alden

Ate aileen

Charm from pup

Richard from sitel

Ecel from feu

Lora from feu

Grays from medical city

Pao from ict

| my brand new video iPOD..

| small momma's birthday

Today is the birthday of my mom.. she turned 62 this day.. as a surprise, a planned a little celebration for her.. I’m like piolo in the selecta commercial minus the wrecked car and the party balloons.. I gave money to my ninang lulu (mom’s sister) to buy ingredients for the food.. and after work, I bought her cake and ice cream.. small celebration but indeed, very much appreciated by my mother.. love you ‘my..

| good news and bad news..

my schedule swap was already approved by workforce and starting on monday, ill be starting my shift from 12am to 9am.. and since there will still be overtime, more probably, ill be staying till xm radio closes which is at 2pm.. ill be missing my team, my friends and a whole lot more!!! and will try to fit in to my new team.. hope they'll like me (well, everbody likes me... i am so likeable... naahhh!!!) also, have learned that i topped the QA stack ranking.. cant belive that.. all eyes were on me because i fill that number 1 position.. it's the first time that really happens after the most number of overtime hours was posted.. but anyways, with that title, it comes with responsibility - the duty to make quality calls and to maintain it as much as possible.. aside from that, we were already informed about the incentives that we'll be getting this coming 28th.. for all the radios that i was able to upsell, i will be getting $375 for those, aside from the incentives for the quality scores, absenteesm, and after call work.. woah!! cant wait for that day.. but with great prices come with great drawbacks - talking about the taxes!!! fu** sh**

| holy wed and maundy thurs..

went to the wake of my lola on wed's eve.. all my relatives were there including my fave cousins.. talked about lots of stuffs including love life.. they were forcing me to share a story but as much i'd love to, i have nothing to share.. instead, what i told them was that i've been doing lots of overtime and they hated me for that.. they noticed that i lost huge amount of weight and that i have a cute blonde hair wehehe.. they've been forcing me to join pinoy big brother (woah!! lots of support from the families of my family).. i actually tried auditioning during the first season of pbb over the phone.. i underwent lots of interviews and we stayed for at least an hour on the phone.. but then the format of screening changed, that they actually required the applicants to audition personally in abs-cbn.. and since i was an intern during that time, i cant possibly audition to pbb for security purposes.. well anyways, now that they've opened another season for teenagers, i was definitely not qualified for the current season anymore (though i look more like a highschool stud hehe).. after the wake, i went to the office to render overtime hours, they were so hesitant to let me go to the office during that time of the day.. but i explained to them that i have made a commitment and i dont want to have records of tardiness or absences.. they accompanied me instead to get a cab... knowing that the whole family was with me before i jumped into the cab, the cab driver for sure can not make any doubtful actions.. and so i got to the office and worked and worked and worked!!!

arrived at home at around three in the afternoon.. and slept for the whole 12 hours.. from 3pm - 3.20am.. felt like i woke up from the grave..

| holy week.. (part 2)

Holy Tuesday - the day started out just fine.. so fine to be exact.. not to mention that i woke up late.. i woke up at 4 am considering my shift is at 4:30 am.. geezz!!! hurried myself and took a shower.. did not eat my breakfast and hailed a cab (which is the last that i would do if only i woke up early - remember my thrift plan!) instead of worrying about my charges for my fair, i was ecstatic when the cab driver asked me, "Sir, where are you going???" - like why on earth was he talking like that??.. i responded to him, "Eastwood lang po!" and then he commented, "Ay bossing kala ko amerikano kayo, tisoy kase kayo eh... kala ko tuloy mauubusan na ako ng English".. and that was so nice to remember.. having someone fooled by me.. someone who has mistakenly identified me as a caucasian.. well anyways, the driver was so verbose and he indeed established rapport during the course of our travel.. props to you Manong! and for that, i gave him a tip.. :-)

later that day, me and best buddy in college (ninay) met up in Espana because we have planned to have our reservation in ERA Review Center for our certification.. i missed her so much.. we summoned at McDonald's P. Campa and bought one of those coke mcfloats.. if only i knew that it will cause me no good (and i mean no good at all - no for spoilers!) i would'nt have bought it in the first place.. after paying for my reservation fees, we went to Robinson's Place.. she was complaining that she was starving and stuff like that so we dined in first in Dulcinea.. ordered one of the healthiest, stuffed meal there - Tornadio a la Sevillana (i think!) and pasta bolognese and bottomless iced teas.. we were so satisfied with the food and were so full when we left there.. and that's where the mcfloat kicked in.. my stomach was so aching and the sudden feeling to unload came up.. we tried sitting on benches to stop the pain and i also tried to drink 2 imodiums to stop it, but guess what, it only aggreviated the pain.. the more i felt to release (whew!).. and so the last resort is to find a comfort room (which i can be comfortable with), but how could i be comfortable in pooing if there are lots of people in that room.. though i have decided to poo in a public cr for the first time and even had my paraphernalia ready, i still could not do it.. we even thought of asking the sales lady in a boutique and have her paid just to let me use their cr, but we didnt think that will work out.. the best last thing that we have resorted - actually, it was my idea, was to find a hotel wherein i can find pleasure for my raging gastroninestinal hormones.. and i actually caught this board saying "SOGO HOTEL"... hmmm... tik-tak-tik-tak-tik-tak... B-I-N-G-O! i immediately told ninay about that and she didnt hesitate at all.. she was more than willing to ease the pain i am suffering.. and so we hailed a cab and asked the driver, "Boss, san ba may malapit na sogo dito??", the driver then replied, "Dyan lang, sakay na!".. and so we jumped into the cab and waited for our destination.. we have no idea that it will be a walk-in type of hotel.. and so we walked through the front doors and immediately asked the receptionist, "Boss, meron ba kayong 1 hour lang??", and he answered back, "Sori, 2 hours yung minimum namin eh.." and so we agreed to that and paid Php 230.00 for the last thing on my mind was to find another motorist hotel who could have let us stay for one hour only.. we hurried to the third floor where our assigned room was and even got lost in a labyrinth-like hallways.. ninay even opened the wrong door and have a sneek at what whoever-they-are-who-were-so-stupid-for-not-locking-their-doors were doing.. that was so hilarious.. and we finally located our nest.. and have my baggages released in the bathroom's throne.. it's a memoir i'll never forget.. that for once in my life, i chose to check in to a hotel because of diarrhea..

after that, arvin (ninay's boyfriend) fetched us and actually scolded us for moving in to a hotel like that.. but that was okay.. im sure he understood why.. and to compensate for the shame and nothing but shame and also for us to bond together after few months, i invited them to panay kalipay - one of the eat-outs in Baywalk Roxas Blvd.. though, we might not have the best band along the boulverad during that night, we enjoyed each other and drink ourselves up.. haha.. we tried ordering some of the cocktails but instead what we got are the mocktails (the hell i know where that word came from!).. we actually thought they were the same, so we ordered three different ones - sherley temple, four seasons and virgin collade, which turned out to be just one of their best sodas, juices and shakes.. yuck!! and so we feast ourselves for San Migueeell Beer Light (as what ninay said) instead.. i missed my friends so much!!

| holy week.. (part 1)

to start the week with - Palm Sunday, came to work early.. rendered rest day overtime to earn more money.. i wanna improve myself.. i wanna work my butt off to avoid an idle mind.. besides, i have nothing to do at home.. so might as well come to work.. the only thing i hate when coming to work is the afterwork.. knowing that i'll be walking under the sun makes me sick.. i hate the sun.. trying to save some pennies nowadays that's why as much as possible, i've been stopping myself to hail a cab.. been thinking hard about the offer of my colleague to swap my schedule to hers.. 12:30am - 9:30am with sat and sun off.. hmm??.. my schedule at the review center will be mwf 1:00pm - 4:00pm.. but i'm also considering the offer of mommy joanne to be with her in Sitel's new account to be located in Boni, Mandaluyong.. it's a financial account and we will be the first batch.. it will actually start in the first week of may.. dunno yet the schedule but if ever the schedule will be in the evenings as well - i might consider more to be relocated in that account.. though i have grown to love XM Satellite Radio.. but i have always been a person of change.. i'm sure i wouldn't regret it if i step out of the box and move out from my comfort zones..

Holy Monday - a shocker!! my other grandma here in my family's compound passed away.. early this year, my grandma died and now my other lola died as well with the same cause of death - aging and pneomonia.. ahh!! i feel sad.. there will be no funeral services from thurs - sundays that's why we need to send her to her grave this coming wednesday, meaning two nights of wake only.. whew!!
went out to metrobank plaza this morning to fill out the graduates info sheet.. i was a metrobank scholar for three and a half years and they've been supportive about my welfare and career growth upto this time.. they were personally offering me to work to their company or if not, to any of their subsidiaries.. and this coming april 21, they want me to come to their career day wherein representatives from different companies would hold job interviews.. pretty nice offer but i dont know if i can come.. but i will try to come though.. and this coming april 22, we will be having a graduates forum.. a whole day event (from 7:30am - 10pm).. i still aint sure if i can come as well because that day is jhen's graduation celebration (one of my bestfriends).. gotta real tough things to decide.. hope i'll make good ones..

to be continued..

| white party..

Team Amihan's

boneyard peeps..

(starting from the upper left)

Dayniel, Sugar, Daddy Vins, Ate Alpi, Jayce, Joshh, Juedi, Vikk, Vickie, Ja, Denz, Rich, and Norlie..

| love quotes..

from kaye,

sometimes we think that feeling something is enough, but we don’t realize that when we don’t take the risks and do something about what we feel, the feeling just goes away and we miss out on what could have been beautiful..

from ninay,

love changes you.. the way you think, the way you act, the way you decide.. sometimes you even go against your principles and beliefs in life.. loving doesn’t always mean you’ll be happy.. sometimes, all it provides you is pain and misery.. yet you are blinded by strong emotions that you fail to see reality.. sometimes, letting go is the only answer and it hurts like hell.. but you will soon realize that it is better if the person you love would be happy to someone else – than lonely with you.. and that’s what you call sacrifice..

from marlene,

people fall in love not knowing why nor how.. it’s a special feeling that doesn’t require much answers.. you just love no matter how stupid you become..

from grays,

don’t let false love fool you, but don’t let real love pass you by.. cause the easy part of life is finding someone to love, and the hard part is finding someone to love you back..

from mommy Joanne,

sometimes you just have to forget the rules, follow your heart and see where it takes you.. never apologize for saying what you feel because it’s like saying sorry for being real.. never regret anything you said or did because at some point, it was what you wanted.. true strength is being able to hold it all together when everyone else is expecting you to fall apart..

from ninay,

it is an enigma when you fall in love and accept that some good things never last and suddenly, you’ll see yourself as nothing, nothing but a loser.. it’s an agony to accept that despite the feelings you have, it is all not enough.. but when you love someone, you’d do the hardest thing.. yes, it’s not going to be easy but at least you know that what you felt is real.. in the end, you’ll ask yourself, “does it hurt?”.. then you’ll close your eyes and whisper, “yes.. but it’s all worthwhile..”

from mj,

Cinderella walked on broken glass.. sleeping beauty let a whole lifetime pass. Belle fell in love with a hideous beast.. Pocahontas risked her life for a feast.. jasmine could have had anyone but instead he chose a poor man.. and ariel walked for the first time on land.. all for love and all for life.. it was all about blood, sweat and tears.. love is all about facing your biggest fears and not letting the moment pass you by..

| gus..

At last the long wait was over, the love of my life – gus has finally proposed his love to me.. I need not say “I love you, too" cause apparently, it was indeed obvious how much I love him.. the whole world knows what I’ve been through to finally succeed in my endeavor of capturing his heart.. the moment I learned that he was letting go of his past, I felt excited that after 7 long months of waiting, I can finally have my turn.. and so I texted him telling him how glad I was about his decision.. I offered him help to forget the past.. GOD knows how long I’ve been waiting for this thing to happen.. I felt elated how things were going and will be going.. we started going out.. we eat out often at Pizza Hut, Yellow Cab, Sbarro, Fazoli’s, Something Fishy, McDonald’s, Sugarhouse, Red Ribbon, Serye, Dencio’s, Cibo, Teriyaki Boy.. we dyed our hair together at Bench Fix and have our hair styled by our favorite stylist – LG.. we shopped our clothes from People R People, Folded n Hung, Human, Nike, and in Ukay-ukay (a thrift store).. we have the same chucks from Shoe Salon – green for him and pink for me.. we have the same teddy bear bought from Bear Hug – his was named Ziggy while mine was named Chucky.. he was there when I bought my ipod video which I’ve been dreading to buy since Christmas.. he was also there when I bought my birthday present for myself – nokia n70.. he would also fetch me after my review classes and would buy me food for merienda – so sweet.. we would even go to his place after my classes to have our bonding moments.. and when Sunday comes, we would go to church together and catch a movie after that.. a lot of things happened and the next thing I know, we were celebrating our 1^st anniversary – my first ever!

Everything seemed perfect at that time.. all my dreams came true and there’s nothing more I can ever ask for.. all I wanted was somebody who could love me and somebody I could die for because of love..

Until I heard my mom knocking at my door and telling me, “anak gising na, kakain na!”.. darn it.. that was just a dream.. and like most of my dreams, this one’s not gonna happen.. it’s never gonna happen.. it wont happen..

If there’s something I’m so good at – it is dreaming..

“hay ang sarap mangarap!”

| new look.. c/o of Bench Fix Libis

check out stripped! for more pics..

| what i've been doing lately..

reading novels: just finished Dan Brown's Da Vinci Code and will be starting his prequel of DVC - Angels and Demons.. not to mention that im trying to fit into my reading time Barbara Bretton's classic romance Maybe This Time and Jennifer Wiener's In Her Shoes..

watching series: American Idol is the top pick.. always been a fan.. ready-ing my pc to download AI5 mp3s.. eyeing for Kelly Pixler and of course, another rock-idol-soon-to-be Chris Daughtry.. also catching The OC's and North Shore's first season.. and my night wouldnt be complete if i havent gaze at the characters of Princess Lulu, My Name is Kim Sam Soon, Enkantadia, Starstruck and PBB.. love 'em all..

cleaning my room: started putting all my stuff toys into their own spot.. placing my jeans and shirts in my closet and fixing my bulky documents and disposing those that need to be disposed.. illuminated my room with enough lights and wiping dirts of my hatred brother's dvds..

sanitation of the soul, the heart and the mind..

| a testimonial for missy..

the sister that I never have.. that’s the exact phrase that would describe her.. I love her so much that I treat her more like a sister.. to give you the exact details on how we met, it started during the orientation here in Sitel.. before sending us home during that night, the hr manager gave us the instructions for our foundation training and with those they included as well the location of our sites.. little did we know that we will be assigned at the same site – hanston building in ortigas.. and so, we felt obliged to be acquainted with each other because we will be spending the next two weeks of training together but we never did.. it was ate maricel who introduced us with each other.. I admit I was so shy at first but I was never plastic (just like what she always tell as her first impression daw to me).. I just don’t feel like conversing that much to a person I hardly knew.. and so we parted ways.. we met again on Monday morning in sitel for the contract signing.. she was with ate maricel and some peeps I cant even remember and I was with pat (one of our common friends, danessa and some other person).. we took off the building at the same time.. the plan was to take two cabs that would fetch us to hanston by fours.. and missy was gazing at me with the sumama-ka-na-samin look on her face but I didn’t.. Im with pat and the rest of the gang beside me.. and so they were the first to get their cab and when it was our turn, I told my peeps that I felt guilty because I let missy alone together with the aged peeps.. she was obviously out of their age bracket and she was definitely in our league.. but let bygones be bygones.. and so we got to our destination clueless.. I misguidedly identified their batch as my batch because they were located in the 8^th floor while my batch was located in the 5^th floor.. and so karma struck me for not attending to her request (by looks) because they were all together while I was left alone with the older peeps hehe.. but that was aight! Can deal with that.. still, we constantly saw each other in the corridors and in the façade where everybody is having their breaks smoking their lungs up.. she was always with this person that I liked seeing so much back then.. she knows who it was.. and that will remain as our secret girl.. and so the foundation training ended and we began product training – still with their corresponding batches.. but during the midpoint assessment, we got merged for political reasons and we were all aware of that.. because they need to merge only the beautiful ones and we should obviously be put together.. lolz..

having been the ones to move to their batch was so hard for me and my batchmates.. we were only like 9 persons collaborated with a 20-person batch.. and so we haven’t had the chance to be together cause we never mingled ourselves with them.. she remained with her peeps and I remained with mine.. and so product training ended and we were off to the on-the-job training.. after that, we were grouped with our respective teams.. I even introduced one of my closest friends to her because they will be teammates.. and so that was it.. the end of our journey..

never in my thoughts occurred that we will become as close as what we are right now.. it was because of enzo that I finally got the chance to be involve with her.. enzo was my teammate and he was one of her peeps.. I just cant remember when we exactly exchanged numbers and even shared our life stories with each other.. it just so happened.. all I know is that we share the same color.. I like pink a lot but she loves pink to death.. to the point that all of her clothing would have a touch of pink.. to her blush on, to her bag, to her top and even to her undergarment.. sometimes, she’ll wear gold but she makes sure that she has gold accessories, gold bag and gold shoes… or even silver with silver bag, silver sandals and silver rings, bracelets and you-know-what-else.. name it and she’ll have it.. lately, she wears purple top (the one that we bought from our latest shopping spree) and to my prediction, she has purple bag as well as purple cap with it.. whew! it takes a true fashionista to have the same color of apparels to wear for the day.. whatever color motif she would prefer for the day, it’s for sure that every piece of clothing she put has to have the touch of that color.. that’s my sister.. terno kung terno hehe..

maybe that’s why we got along so much, I like putting the same color to my outfit as well but not with the same intensity as she is putting to her looks.. mine was kinda subtly but hers was more of a vulgar.. but anyways, we share the same taste of clothes.. we have this pants – the kind of sira-sira - the rugged style that we wore sometimes together with our pink chucks that we bought from the shoe salon together with a pink top that we obviously planned to wear during that day.. it was so cool.. it was our pink panther day (our self-made event that everybody got struck).. we were like the partners in crime forever.. for our next event, we were planning to strut this army pants we spotted here in eastwood.. better watch out for that folks! It will be a militia day in eastwood by the time we walk in the pavements of a crimeless city..

aside from having so much delight with the way we dress together, we also love taking pictures.. to her boyfriend’s dismay, I have lots of pictures than him in her fone.. well, you cant beat a relationship made out of blood (I do not literally mean blood as in consanguinity) but there was an instance that I cut myself and to be a true hero – as a genuine sister of mine – she pulled out a band aid she kept in her wallet for a long time and sealed my small-turning-to-nothing-but-small wound.. hehe.. I would have panicked during that instance but she undoubtedly helped me out.. though it was a very good little deed, it meant something to me.. one of the reasons why I love this girl so much.. she would protect me to the full extent of her capacity..

I remembered her shooing my crush-turned-enemy away when he approached near to us.. she learned that this guy was exposing my text message to everybody bragging that I sent him this message telling him that I love him so much – which was partly true.. I admit I sent that message out of boredom (I was in a review center that time when I sent that dreadful message).. but as a true sister that would protect her brother, she said loudly to this guy “ang kapal ng mukha mo, feeling mo ang gwapo mo! Eeww!!” it was so nice that there’s someone who would protect me even if it was my mistake.. a true consitidora!

But there was a moment where I had the chance to bring back the favor.. I remember the times she was bothered by her ex because of the decision she made.. she broke up with that poor guy in favor of something else.. and we both knew that.. im sorry but I cant tell it here for security purposes.. because she never spoke up with what truly happened with that guy, I was the one who got caught in the middle.. but still, in the end, I stood by her side and supported her all the way though her decision was a little questionable for me – but hey im her brother and nothing would change that even her obvious off decisions.. I would still love her despite of the things she does to her life..

And also, to bring back all the goodness that she made for me.. I let her finish my lunch always.. this girl has a big appetite.. well, most people don’t know about that.. after payday, we would treat each other out.. we would dine out to the most expensive restos in eastwood, try to pamper ourselves a little.. haha.. she is starbuck’s caramel frappe while I am starbuck’s mocha frappe.. we share the same brand of noodles.. YAKISOBA seafood or beef would do.. we would literally sink our rice in noodles we bought from vendo and racing with each other to eat as many as we can because we share the same lunch.. and lastly, we would sit next to each other, have our screens colored pink and would help each other with very difficult phone calls..

One thing I haven’t said to missy yet is that, she's one of the reasons why I love working in sitel.. knowing that I can count on her always makes me believe that I have the greatest treasure life has to offer.. our working relationship would surely not last that long but our friendship would for sure last a fortune.. against all odds, you are my little sister and I am your big brother.. we would praise each other’s looks always and we would save each other’s seat most of the times, but above all that, we know that we’re just here to be with each other and it just so happened that we love each other.. you are the sister that I never have but not anymore, cause you are the sister I’m beginning to share my life with..

i love you sis..

| we've gone upselling..

- aside from activating a radio, answering billing inquiries, and providing technical know-how - we are now upselling XM RADIOs to our customers...

here's the catch, for every radio sold you'll get to have $5-incentive..

and just before lunch break, i was able to close three deals.. yipee!!

| jazz up your day..

trying to make myself content nowadays.. ive been sick these past few days and im struggling for my breath every night because of my asthma.. guess this is an outcome of what i have endured for overworking again and for rendering overtime hours and not having enough sleep.. financially, i love the idea of earning a lot without having that much to do.. the company is just running for production hours and since the call volume is not that much, it makes us idle during login hours - and the good thing about that is we are being paid.. though we really cannot sleep on the floor.. but still, coming to work has been a lot of fun for me.. have my friends here and have countable crushes that really make me want to come to work hehe.. but i know i cant go beyond that.. as much as possible, i am trying to maintain professional relationship with my officemates.. though i have invested a lot for friendship to some but that's a totally different thing.. i mean, i couldnt have stayed long in this company if not for them.. i have mommy lou who shared sentiments with me.. who ive trusted the most and who i can share the most struggling moments i've been having because of work.. not to mention that i dragged her everytime i want to go shopping, smoking and even going to the men's room.. i have my sis - missy, who ive grown to love as my real sister.. she's like a sister that i never have.. my partner in crime.. my superfriend.. my better half.. we share the same color, the same jeans and even the same chucks.. and we're both stubborn.. grrrr!!! i'll be posting our pics later this month.. havent uploaded them yet.. that's it.. peace out!

| ain't too proud to beg..

I know you wanna leave me , but I refuse to let you go.. If I have to beg, plead for your sympathy, I don't mind 'cause you mean that much to me.. Ain't too proud to beg, sweet darling, please don't leave me boy, don't you go.. Ain't to proud to plead, baby, baby please don't leave me boy, don't you go.. Now I've heard a crying man is half a man, with no sense of pride butif I have to cry to keep you I don't mind weeping if it'll keep you by my side.. Ain't too proud to beg, sweet darling, please don't leave me boy, don't you go (Don't you go away).. Ain't too proud to plead, baby, baby please don't leave me boy, don't you go..

| my name is julius andrew..

and here are my random rantings..

- i was named after julie andrews, the star of "the sound of music"

- i used to be picked when i was a child and the phrase goes, "jay, jay pak sinapak tulog - paggising sa umaga wala ng betlog"

- i never celebrated father's day.. there's no reason for me to..

- i'm a fan of Liwayway, a local magazine, that unleashed my sexuality and my sexual fantasies..

- i grew up playing jolens together with my cousins.. all of em are boys except me (who hid in the closet for several years)

- never really liked the taste of fresh milk unless if you pour cereals on it.. kokocrunch!

- lived in a spanish antique house for several years cause the real property of our clan was demolished by the jap..

- a nursery valedictorian, a kindergarten honor stud, multi-awarded junior sports journalist, most outstanding cadet, theater artist, cheerdancer, dean's lister, metrobank scholar, leadership awardee..

- unpredictable dumbness overshadowed my achievements..

- i dont go to church that often but i have faith..

- had four ex-girlfriends and wanting to have one again if i can..

- had lots of flings (cant help it!)

- my heart was broken several times but im still whole.. im trying to be for the person who will be willing to love me in the future..

- a coccaine - methamphetamine - grass user..

- bisexual by nature..

- "i wish i know how to quit you... i really wish i know how.."

| change of mind..

suddenly, need the feel to be in a night shift.. wondering why?? cause im damn fucking late these past few days.. so hard to wake up in the morning and the chill of dawn keeps me asleep upto five thirty considering that my shift is at six.. and what is fucking more is getting into the office with no available cubes.. that makes it even sicker.. especialy during wednesdays in which the office was overstaffed.. damn! it's so ard to get an available station during the morning shift.. and after shift, the heat of the sun is unbearable.. ahh.. those are just shallow reasons, i know.. there's a deeper reason why the sudden change of mind.. it's something personal and once havent been resolved, that i would want to open up yet.. for the meantime, im getting my connections pry for some eager soul who would want to trade sched with me..

| family feud

i hate my brother for not respecting my mother and even the members of our family.. he chose to believe his wife and his wicked sister-in-law.. it hurts us all when his wife took away his son (my pamangkin-inaanak) from us considering the love we showed to 'em.. i hate him for shouting at my mom o'er the fone and sending messages to us to stop seeing his child and leaving his family alone.. i dont know what has gotten into my sister-in-law's mind for my brother to react that way.. i dont even know if im in the position to hinder this growing family feud.. but one thing's for sure, i miss jm.. my prayers will aways be with you kiddo..

| take it from me..

a message i sent to the one im greatly indebted for.. gus..

"wala na akong balak maghanap.. papakasaya na lang ako.. life is too short to weep and cry for something that is not meant for us.. we do have a short wonderful life to live.. so, rock on! kiss your worries away.. im glad im back on my feet again.."

"... you dont have to apologize, you've been an inspiration and you've taught me a lot.. the best thing i learned from you is that there is still life after one great love.. that love is not a resting place nor a final destination.. it is something that, once found, should be lived upon and celebrated every single day of our lives.. that is why i am celebrating L.O.V.E. - not the typical romantic feeling, but in general which encompasses every one around me.."

"pain is part of the learning.. bitter sweet as they say.. you couldnt expect me to learn more without hurting me.. wala kang kasalanan.. you simply played a role of a good eye-opener.. very well-played indeed.. andami kong natutunan.. so, stop blaming yourself for my misery before.. it's so yesterday!"

| the irony of valentine..

Valentine’s day is supposedly a celebration of love, of two hearts entwined to each other, and of two souls who found peace with each other.. guess that’s not what it meant for me.. never in my wildest dreams did i think that during this day, my first valentine having someone to finally shared it with (emotionally) for the past twenty one years of my life, will I feel such enormous pain and seclusion.. it was excruciating and throbbing having been dumped during the day i thought would turn out to be perfect having been qualified to finally rejoice the day of St. Valentine because of the status I carried (not being single at that point).. but I became conscious that the status “taken” only made me more liable to endure more twinge especially during the day which should be celebrated by loving couples – and only by loving partners!! and my partner for sure could not take the guilt of not feeling the same way i felt towards him that’s why he chose to unload me in his baggage.. i do feel for him, i know there’s no easy way to break someone else’s heart but you just have to do it.. and maybe he was thinking, “what’s the point of celebrating anyway?? I don’t feel something – that thing (love) – that I should to be on my feet and party during this day.. and in the shortest sense - I don’t love you anymore..” hard to swallow, tough to get through, and just one hell of mind-breaking, soul-freaking, suck-it-hard line that nobody would want to hear during the most celebrated day of lovers like us, or if we were such in that category.. and learning that from him, i started questioning what went wrong.. you would never want to know his reason why.. cause it’s a simple “it’s not with you, it’s with me..”

| let's celebrate L.O.V.E.

still in the process of contemplating my thoughts ...

| shift bid..

shift bid - def. to bid/propose for a shift that you want according to your lifestyle for the next quarter of the year and in accordance to that, you must be able to place on the top ranking of the company's top performers to get more options..

luckily, out of more or less 300 agents that XM Radio has in Sitel i was able to rank 12th on the stack ranking of the company.. that gives me the prospect to bid for a morning shift.. i want a day job, though i really wanna be in the night shift cause of the night differential.. but hey, i want my bodyclock to be normal cause i'd like to gain weight and redeem my strength.. i lost a couple of pounds during the last OT race.. and im preparing myself again cause ive heard rumors that there will be a new race this coming summer and i would really like to prepare for that.. i want to win again *chuckles*.. i maybe a workaholic cause i dont want to be idle and during my offs, i would miss my station and the urge to speak with americans.. the passion to really help people out is still in my blood and though, my mom really disagrees about the knd of job that i have i dont give a damn.. im happy with it and so far im liking it more.. so for the next three months, ill be working my ass out from tuesday to saturdays six ey-em to three pee-em :-)

| pasiyam..

It was over.. Our mournings and long days of praying for my grandma's soul have finally come to its peak.. The other day, we celebrated the Pasiyam of my lola.. Pasiyam is actually a Filipino tradition offered to a dead relative. It is done on the ninth day after the death of a person. During "Pasiyam", the people join in prayer for the repose of the soul of the departed. Foods are also served for the people who join the bereaved family. We do have feast of delicacies from pastas to chicken to filipino dishes and to sweet delights.. During the interment of my lola, i was the one who read the readings from the BIBLE as well as the responsorial psalm and prayer for her soul.. Before the mass ended, the priest asked who would like to speak in the family's behalf for the final words.. None of us agreed cause we really cant bear the pain during that time and so let me tell here what i couldve told everybody during that moment, "i'd like to thank all of those people who graced their presence during one of the toughest times in our lives (me and my family), those who shared their prayers and sympathy to my wonderful lola who has been the greatest among her generations.. it was indeed, through your support and love, that we found strength to withstand the loneliness that was killing us.. rest assured that all the efforts that you guys made were well-appreciated and welcomed by the whole family.." Thank you to the ones who showed love during my distress...

| and so grandma passed away..

yesterday morning, i heard my grandma grasping for breath.. so loud that even i am inside the shower room i can still hear her breathing so hard.. i told my mom about that.. she said yeah she knew it.. and told me to worry no more cause she'll be having her weekly check up that morning.. so before i leave yesterday, i looked at her and told her you're gonna be okay grandma.. and so i went to work.. from there, i learned that i was about to get the prize of my overtime hours on the next payday which was on the 28th of the month.. told myself, isnt it too late because i even promised my mom that as soon as get the pot money im gonna buy medicines for my sick grandma.. and so that was okay.. what can i do?? but to wait -- and so i went home after work, starving and sleepy.. as i entered the door, no one seems to answer my call.. hmm.. pretty odd cause normally when i got home i would see my mom preparing my food already but nobody was there.. and so i asked my relatives in the compound for the whereabouts of my mom.. they told me the shocking news that grandma already passed away.. well, that explains the reason why her bedsheets were already folded and kept.. i dunno what to say then.. the idea of losing her didnt sink into me that instantly.. i thought she was still having this operation and im praying she'll make it through.. she was diagnosed of pneumonia (not just the ordinary one!!) i really dont know the exact name of it - my bad!! and then i called my bestfriends, my close friends.. breaking them the news i found out was the hardest thing to do - much more when i did it to my brother who was at overseas.. i cant find the exact words to say but, "wala na si lola.. iniwan niya na tayo!!".. the only regret i have inside is the fact that i wasnt able to help her out when i had the chance to.. i even told my mom that im going to buy her medicines once i received the prize for my award.. one of the reasons why i joined the OT race in our company is to help her out.. but i guess that was too late.. even before i had the chance to do that for her, she already left us.. i remembered my aunt and mom crying so hard when they arrived home.. stuttering, my mom told us how the operation went through.. the doctors were trying to get blood from her body but the syringe could not get in to any of her veins.. they have been doing that for two hours and luckily, a vein was spotted wherein they could get a blood sample from her.. and then the x-ray was done.. she was about to be transferred to the 4th floor of the hospital for the next operation, she was at ER in the first floor prior to that... and when they went, the doctors were so pleased to see my grandma.. they were checking her condition until the doctor said "oh, bakit wala ng pulse si lola!!" and then the nurses rushed in and immediately did everything to revive her.. my mom who was the only who witnessed that was so shocked and didnt know what to do.. she didnt know whom to turn to or seek for help.. she didnt bring her fone with her.. and so, the doctors were trying to open her mouth to put the tube that was supposed for oxygen breathing but grandma doesnt want to open it anymore.. it's a silent way of saying she gave up.. she had lots of suffering already and maybe, that was her time to go away.. my other aunt who was at the pharmacy back then went up to the 4th floor to see my grandma's condition.. as she was going up, she noticed some butterflies approacing her way.. minding about the condition of my lola, she didnt pay attention to the insects.. little did she know that maybe, that was my grandma's soul.. i really miss my grandma so much.. it's the first time that we lost an immediate family member and it was so hard that i cant even imagine.. harder than i felt whenever i see someone dying in the movies.. the last time i told my grandma that i love her was maybe 3 days before she left.. if only i knew that she'll be passing away yesterday, i couldve told her many i love yous then.. i was a lola's boy and forever will be.. the values that she shared to me will be forever be in my heart and i will keep her in my heart as long as i can.. i love you lola.. i just cant believe you passed away.. ill be missing you..

| DSL mode..

finally, after a long argument and persuasion between me and my family members, they gave in to let me and my cousin sign up for a dsl service through pldt.. at last, long hours of dial up are now over and i can have the unlimited hours of downloading my fave mp3s and videos (porn hehe!!).. new year, new air to breathe.. though havent that much luck for love, ive got nothing to worry with my friends around.. earlier today, four of my college kadas contacted me to help em get in to my company.. without batting an eyelash, i immediately made myself accountable for their entrance.. id do anything to help em get in.. good thing i've known someone from the hr.. maybe i could fix some one night stand in favor of their hiring.. just kidding.. but if that's what it'll take to help my friends get in, why not??? i mean, i could do everything for my loved ones, what difference does it make if id do somethig outrageous like that for my friends?? im keeping my fingers crossed, planning ahead of the things we'll be doing when they get hired and lots of fun and laughters we'll be sharing on the floor.. im so excited for that matter.. my adrenalins are rushing up aside from the fact that i had a straight 20-hour sleep.. geez, im so ready for the year ahead - for all the challenges and memories im going to make..

year 2006 will just like be a dsl mode for me - unlimited services at 100MBPS..

| Thank You For Your Love by DIMSUM

My life was a constant uphill climb Never got it right Each one I loved went through a change of heart You came and my world turned upside down You sung a different tune Can't let go It keeps playing on my mind Now there's a reason to wake up each day A reason to shake my blues away Now I am whole, a lucky soul I wanna thank you for your love Thank you Thank you for your love Confused My heart was in a daze Learn to live with pain I loved too haste then watch it go to waste You came and brought music to my soul Inspired me to the very core You touched me well No one has been before * Now there's a reson to wake up each day I thank the Lord for sending you my way Now I am whole, a lucky soul I wanna thank you for your love Thank you Thank you for your love I saw the world in shades of black and gray, yey Turning blue with every passing day Just when I thought that maybe all was lost My life took on a new turn And it's all because It's because (repeat *) Now looking back All the pain No more dark clouds

| the bad memories i wanna forget..

1st, the misunderstandings that i have with my friends.. though they were very petty, we made emsuch a big deal that's why the issue got so packed up but id like to keep em all away cause no matter how bad you've been through those days that you misunderstood each other, nothing can compare for the friendship we vested upon each other..

2nd, the affair that did not push through.. maybe, there is really this thing that we call one great love which will come into our life.. too bad, mine had gone away.. it might never come back or it was really never meant for me.. i dont know.. ive been hurting, and with the new year ahead - i really want to give myself a chance to be happy.. no more drama please..

3rd, the coma of my grandma.. i dunno what to feel, got really upset for what happened to her.. she is bedridden and incapable to speak with and recognize us.. ahh!! it was really hard to see her that way.. she used to be alive and so talkative but now she's not.. i miss my lola!!

| carved on the stone..

year 2005 was one of the awesome years of my life.. maybe because of the different things that happened during this year - the good ones and the bad ones which made me become a better person or is it not??!!
oh well, to give you the highlights of the things that transpired throughout the whole year, here it goes..
first quarter of the year - i got hired in abs-cbn as one of the on-the-job trainees.. the time ive been in the company was incomparable.. i got to meet a lot of my idols in person as well as to be a part of my dream company.. i've always wanted to be an entertainer - in the sense that i bring joy to everybody else and though that is not my job description, somehow it felt good to be surrounded by people who have the same passion as mine..
second quarter of the year - got so hooked up with the project study.. got involved so much with my friends and God - i miss em so much.. i've had lots of friends and im so proud to tell that my bonding with my groupmates evolved from scratch to gold.. it was already given to have lots of misunderstandings but that's the whole point that made the friendship grew deeper..
third quarter of the year - busy days!! school stuff was really a pain in the ass.. you could never imagine how tough it was to graduate and earn a degree.. the final test of being a stud - the thesis that made our lives in the edge of breaking down.. im so proud of what we have achieved.. our thesis made it through brunei and even posted in some website for one week.. but of course, thanks to abs-cbn who has been our partner in making the thesis such a huge success.. in excess, love bloomed in the air during this time.. too bad, it was like a smoke that was taken by the wind instantly..
fourth quarter of the year - got my first job ever.. the process of acquiring such was so hard that i almost gave up.. because of the spirit and because of the good intent of having a job, i was able to get in to one of the companies that opened such great oppurtunity for me.. and now im doing what it takes to keep this job and to continually improve myself.. though it's not my profession, but i am happy with what im doing so far..

2005 - a year that laid lots of oppurtunities to my life.. a year that made me realize the purpose of my life.. and a year that wil trademark some of the achievements i have in life.. goodbye two o' five..

| happy birthday kaye!!

kaye's 19th birthday.. oh i miss this girl so much.. been with her since start of the foundation training.. found her to be the snobbish type.. but i thought wrong.. she was one of the sweetest kinds i've ever known so far.. we had something in common - our eyes and our cheeks.. way to go chinovela prince and princess!! too bad we're not scheduled for the same shift.. though we havent seen each other that much and we havent chitchatted much, i know that what we started will still continue to grow.. kaye, you're the greatest emblem of a teenage mother.. continue inspiringyour kinds.. i've been such a fan of your courage and strength ever since so do not change.. hope your problems will fly away as you reach your dream.. i will forever love you just the way you are!! happy birthday!!